Friday, October 1, 2010

Wanted:

  • Somewhere to land for a fresh start.
  • Someone to kick my butt into shape without me having to sell a kidney.
  • Someone to love me for me.
  • An exciting opportunity to do something I love for a living.
  • A place of my own.
  • Motivation.  Lots of it.
  • The ability to speed read with total comprehension and retention.
  • A nap.
  • Really good homemade mac 'n cheese.
  • A high metabolism.
  • A Vita-Mix.
  • Some scratch off lottery tickets.
  • The ability to do yoga without looking like a drunken idiot.
  • A hammock on a tropical island with my name on it.
  • A massage.
  • A facial.
  • To get my hair done professionally and not worry about burning up a Benjamin.
  • New sneakers.
  • My Amazon order.
  • To not have to go back to DH...ever.
  • A cabin in the mountains.
  • A beach house on an island no one has ever heard of.

I could go on and on and on...

Flounder(not the fish)ing

I'm having a tough time.  I know I am stuck in the mother of all ruts, but I can't get motivated to do anything about it.  Each tick of the clock is a missed opportunity that I could care less if I've taken advantage of.  I really have to talk to someone--a professional, unbiased someone.

I've been this way, off and on, for a very long time.  Most people see me as happy-go-lucky, because that's how I portray myself.  I'd say about 65% of the time, it is how I feel.  The other 35% - the 'me' that few people see - is sad, lonely and wallowing in muck so deep it would be very easy to drown.  I don't want to drown.  I keep fighting because I know there is something worth fighting for out there.  I know the last sentence should have read, "...I know I am worth fighting for."

Sunday, September 26, 2010

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Oh what a day I had today!  I worked my 12 hours last night and decided that I wanted to go to church this morning.  Mile Hi Church is the most amazingly inspirational place of worship I've ever been.  I've attended services at many different churches throughout my life, but this is, by far, my favorite and I really look forward to going when I am able.  Today would have been my dad's 63rd birthday, and I'm not sure if that compounded my desire to travel to Lakewood or if I just felt the need to be inspired.  It's actually a bit of both, along with being able to see my Earth Angel and BFF Cindy and sharing in the magic of the day's message.  The sermon was titled, "Simple Acts, Ample Blessings."  In a nutshell, it was just a reminder that if you give selflessly to others, whether in the form of your time, money or whatever you can offer, you will receive blessings in ways you couldn't imagine.  There were some amazing examples of everyday people doing what they could do to enrich the life of another and I was moved to tears.

Afterwards, I purchased a CD of the day's service and we went outside to chat for a bit.  Cindy was talking about the retreat she wants to open, as well as maybe sending me to Hawaii for training with Doreen Virtue.  I really like the way she thinks!!!  Her dream is to open a holistic retreat that offers wellness services of all kinds:  massage, counseling, spa services, readings, etc.  She's already proclaimed that I'll play a part in this wonderment.  I'm very excited to be contributing to people's well-being, especially in this day and age when everyone seems to pack so much into their lives that they forget to take care of themselves and end up falling into dis-ease.

Speaking of packing alot into one day... we then went to Olive Garden for lunch.  We were seated at a small table and it was peaceful...until Gramps and a couple of Hens were seated next to us.  None of them could hear, so essentially, they were shouting at each other throughout their conversations of who has recently died and 'kids' these days.  What I'd hoped would be a relaxing meal turned into an opportunity for me to showcase my sarcasm.  Bad Stephanie!  Fast-forward to the eats-->  My brother chose chicken alfredo pizza and I ordered parmesan crusted tilapia with Italian vegetables and angel hair pasta in a lemon butter sauce.  I dove into the salad and indulged in only one bread stick.  I then picked around my entree and ate until I was satisfied, not stuffed.  I actually think my fish was a little underdone, so that helped keep my appetite in check.  Next stop:  grocery shopping.  After a pretty uneventful trip around Wallyworld, my wallet was $27 lighter (not well thought out on my part) and I was feeling a bit zombie-like.  I still wanted to get my hair cut (using my $5 off coupon) before I went home and got horizontal on my knock-off Tempur-pedic.  Have I mentioned yet that it was hotter than the hubs of Hell outside?  Good gravy, I was sweltering wherever we went!  And getting back into a hot car after each stop was really draining what little energy I had left.

To that end, we rounded out the day with an impromptu stop at Dairy Queen for a frozen treat.  I ordered a small Oreo blizzard and enjoyed each red plastic spoonful.  That is, while trying not to breathe through my nose because some kid shit their pants and their mom was too busy talking to change the damn diaper!!!  I was able to keep my blizzard in check and we came home.  I changed out of jeans and into shorts before assuming my position on the couch.  I clicked on the football game and turned on the crackbox.  It wasn't long before I shut both off and drug my worn-out self into my bedroom and collapsed into bed.  I had been awake for more than 24 hours and I had had enough; it was time to get sideways!  I was awakened 1.5 hours later by my phone ringing:  it was Grandma.  She has been a bit late getting home and wanted to call us.  I called her back (so she wouldn't have to pay for the call) and we chatted for a bit.  She said Fishing Tournament went well and they decided to hold the festival again next year.  All in all, everything was fine on at both homesteads, so we cut our call short.  I told her I love her and I'll talk to her again next week.  I proceeded to fall back into slumber for a couple more hours.  And here I am!

Friday, September 24, 2010

Today's proposed agenda and some randomness

Working nights really wreaks havoc on my body.  I came home Thursday morning after the most hellish night and slept for about five hours.  I went back to bed around 9:30 last night and peeled my body out of bed around 3 this morning.  I got a shower, got dressed and placed my ass in the divot I've worn in the couch.  Sooo...I made some cheesy scrambled eggs and wrapped them in a flour tortilla.  I want to make rigatoni later with homemade marinara and ground turkey.  Lots of fresh garlic, red peppers and onions to make the sauce thick and chunky.  I'll provide some porn shots to accessorize this post later.

And here they are:

The money shot:

Final product:

It turned out really well!  When we were kids, mom used to make rigatoni using ginormous noodles.  Yes, mine were large, per se, but I really miss those specific noodles from my childhood.  Not that they tasted any different; it simply reminds me of a happier time, when life was easy.  My marinara is simple and fresh-tasting.  It's adapted from a recipe of Rachael Ray's.  My interpretation is:

  • one 28 oz can of crushed tomatoes
  • one 15 oz can of tomato sauce
  • Italian seasoning
  • minced garlic
  • chopped onion
  • salt
  • pepper
  • EVOO
  • crushed red pepper flakes
You can add whatever meat and veggies you choose.  I chose red bell peppers because the poblanos and cubanelles looked sickly in every store I went to and I didn't want to put green bells in.  I also contemplated a jalapeno or Anaheim pepper, but they were also under the weather.  I guess it's not pepper season.

We've talked about going to see "You Again" at the theater tonight.  It looks like it'll be pretty funny; Betty White makes me laugh so hard!  I watch her TV show, "Hot in Cleveland" as well and just laugh.  I used to think she was related to me.

UPDATE:  We're not going to see a movie at the theater.  I received my Netflix selections yesterday, so we're opting to view those instead.  Now playing:  "Date Night" and "The Back-Up Plan."  Good night, everyone!

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Vita-Mix 5200


I've been wanting this piece of kitchen genius for quite some time, but the price tag has been the deterrent for me.  Although I have probably spent this much on lesser quality kitchen gadgets that I've broken or given away, it's a big pile of scratch to come up with at one time!



The reason I want one is that it will help me consume more vegetables (minus the mushrooms in the above pic *ack*) and fruits by way of the ever-popular smoothie.  I like v & f; I just don't find myself eating as many as I should.  I also figure if I get a few green drinks in me, it'll help me shed tons some poundage pretty quickly as well as get some much-needed vitamins and minerals naturally.  I'm not one to take pills and potions for my health, but it does need a major overhaul!

Is anyone feeling really generous and would like to gift me one?  :D  You know the girl's gotta try!!!  Does anyone have one and want to share the pros/cons of it?  Holla back, yo!  Uhhh...I'm definitely too cracker to pull that off *ahem*.