Target story

I forgot about this until I was reminiscing through older posts.  It was so funny at the time and I hope I can relay that here.

So, Katie (fellow clerk and friend) and I worked together on Saturday, February 13th.  It snowed a lot overnight, and was a big, slippery mess by the time shift was over Sunday morning.  She offered me a ride home so I wouldn't have to wait in the cold for the bus and I gladly accepted.  She also offered to stop anywhere on the way if I needed to pick up anything.  We decided to stop at Target on the way home because it's right down the street from my place, and she wanted to pick up a couple of things as well.

Target doesn't open until 8 AM, so we took our time trudging through the new snowfall, all the while clucking non-stop like a couple of hens!  Katie drove around the nearly-empty parking lot looking for a space where no one would park close enough to hit her car.  She settled on a space about midway between Colorado Blvd and the front door.  We still had about 20 minutes to kill, so we kept clucking.  =)

Right before the doors opened, someone pulled in directly behind Katie's SUV.  She started exclaiming her discontent and warned the driver, unbeknownst to her, that if she so much as touched her vehicle, she was going to rue the day she was born!  Of course, this is just the start of the best shopping trip, EVER!!!  We made our way through the snowy parking lot to the big red doors.  Katie is so friendly and will chat up anyone.  She started with the guy that opened the store.  We stepped inside and browsed the current ads hung on the wall.  We didn't know what we were there for, so those few minutes were spent in vain.

We chose a buggy and started on our merry, and very tired, way.  Katie talked herself into replacing the bag she carries to work.  We veered off in that direction, and after some laughing at all the patterns, she decided on a plain, black bag comparable to the one she was using.  Mission accomplished!  Next up, feminine hygiene!!!

WARNING:  This is my blog, so I'll post what I want here.  You take the chance to be scarred for life by choosing to read my musings.  That is all the warning you get!  If you proceed, I don't want to hear any belly-aching that it was TMI and you can't look me in the eye ever again.

OK, then.  I had to buy some tampons.  In a not-so-small nutshell, I am insulin-resistant.  I have PCOS.  That wreaks havoc with my reproductive system.  I don't ovulate regularly, so I don't have a normal period.  And what I mean by normal is that I only have a period a few times a year.  When Mother Nature and I do tangle, it resembles someone being murdered!  While making our way to that rotten aisle, we wandered through the Valentine's Day crap.  We were surrounded by guys there trying to get something at the last minute to appease the women (or men) in their lives.  I noticed a box of chocolates with a "PRESS HERE" button.  Of course, I did and the box started spewing out some God-forsaken, moldy-oldie song that made me and Katie laugh so hard!  That did it for her; the ear worm reared its ugly head and she couldn't get the song out of her brain.  I turned the corner and chose the largest box of industrial-sized cotton flowers I could find.  I made it known, quite loudly, that I got my tampons and we could move on.  We wandered around the store with no specific destination in mind.  I overheard a couple looking for breadcrumbs while they wandered aimlessly.  A few minutes later, I stumbled upon the breadcrumbs and let both the employee helping them, the couple and the rest of the people in the store know that they were located in aisle W4.  This little nugget sent us into yet another fit of laughter.

We made our way through each aisle, pondering items, laughing at whatever struck our fancy and choosing random things to buy.  Baked beans, flour tortillas, yogurt-dipped granola bars, jalapeno-cheddar puffed corn, Crystal Light drink mix, etc.  We passed a gentleman stocking shelves several times and he proclaimed his desire to grocery shop with us since we were having so much fun.  We laughed the ENTIRE time we were in the store.  And we were there for more than an hour!  All in all, the trip was a success and my sides hurt from laughing so much!!!  Katie dropped me off and made her way home.  We are talking about taking a bus trip to gamble in Blackhawk or Central City this spring.  I'll keep you posted...

I guess I better get ready for the day ahead.  I need to go get a haircut, then it's home to help prepare lasagna, banana bread, apple crisp and/or mayonnaise cake.  Hamilton wants to bake all those glorious sweets, but we'll see if we actually accomplish them.  Tomorrow, I'm throwing a roast in the crockpot.  Until next time, I wish you (insert your wish here)!  If you don't recognize me, it's because we made it all and I dove head-first into the yummy confections.  Yes, all those chins are mine!  Have you seen my 'wide load' banner???